GP's Guide to the Deadliest Titan Villains!
by Gotham's Princess
Summary: A guide to the Teen Titans's greatest villains and what to do to stop them. Featured: The Fangirl, MarySue, Xavier Red and much more! This week's villain: MarySue!
1. Foreword

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the characters in the guide. Some of them, I don't even want to own.  
**Summary:** A guide to the Teen Titans's greatest villains and what to do to stop them. Featured: The Fangirl, Mary-Sue, Xavier Red and much more!

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**_GP's Guide to the Deadliest Teen Titans Villains  
_**Gotham's Princess**_

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Dear Readers,

You may ask why I'm writing this? Well, truthfully, I don't know. Right now, all I'm trying to do is make you all aware of the terrors of the villain's listed in the guide. Scary thing is, they can't truly be stopped. As long as there is a team called the Teen Titans, these villains will still be here. But I might as well begin the awarness program, though these villains may not notice.

I will write about the terrors of Mary-Sues, and their creator, the evil, fanatical, Fangirl. You will witness the truth behind Xavier Red and the horrors of Bad-Plot Syndrome. Some of you may have already encoured these horrendous monsters, and have tried to put a stop to them. You may have not succeeded, or you may have. At least you tried.

For those of you who haven't met these villains, be afraid. Be very afraid.

Sincerly,

Gotham's Princess

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Reviews are appreciated.


	2. The Horrors of Fangirl

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** **Name:** Fangirl 

**Age:** 11-13

The Fangirl: quite possibly the most deadly of the Titan villains. Fangirl has to ability to morph the Titans' personalities into anything they wish, no matter how different than said Titan normally acts. Speedy would become an abusive boyfriend. Beast Boy would become a mindless idiot in her grasp. She also has the power to make up the most atrocious alternate lives for the said heroes. Let's use Starfire as an example. Fangirl ignores the fact that her name is spelled Kory, a decides that despite being named Kory for the past twenty-some years, Kori is a better, supposedly 'more-hip' name. When corrected, Fangirl goes into a crying fit and calls the corrector 'meanie'. Fangirl usually puts Starfire into plots that involve her being whiny and extra-stupid, not knowing how to work a gas-tank. She is put in a relationship with Robin, who is named Richard because Fangirl is afraid of the name 'Dick', who usually ignores her, and ends up making-out with Deus Ex Machina, also known as sweet, darling, Mary-Sue. Poor, poor Kory.

Fangirl is easily recognizable, with here constant bragging of how 'smart' she is because she gets straight 'As' in all of her classes, and her constant need to boast about this. Her name is often followed by a series of numbers, or is typed in a pattern of capital letters and lower-case letters. If none of the following is present, the names may also be written in what is known as 'txt tlk' or 'leet speak'.

Even though she is such a villain, Fangirl has many fears. One of which is the name 'Dick'. Fangirl refuses to use that name, replacing it with Richard, despite the fact that Richard John Grayson has been called 'Dick' since his creation in 1940, which is nearly four times as old as her. Fangirl has no appreciation for history and refuses to admit she is wrong when the obvious is stated. Poor, poor, villainess. It should also be noted that Fangirl's other arch-enemy is none other than Dick Van Dyke. Fangirl is also afraid of grammar, refusing to use it in any of her fan fiction 'stories', if they deserved to be called that.

Sadly, there has been no known method for completely destroying Fangirl, except for excessive flaming.

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_Chapter 2: Mary-Sue_


	3. Mary Sue

**Name: **Mary-Sue

**Age: **Varies

**Alias: **Deus Ex Machina, Plot D. Vice

Meet Mary-Sue. She seems like an innocent, sweet, loving girl, but be warned. It isn't an act. She is innocent, sweet, and loving: too innocent, sweet, and loving. She isn't mean-spirited and even if she does get angry, it is because she is 'passionate' about things.

Mary-Sue has amazing powers which can get any of the Titans out of any situation. Often, she is new to these powers, but has amazing control over them. Mary-Sue is often very intelligent, and cis a better technician than Cyborg and can stump Robin and Batman in solving mysteries. Somehow, Mary-Sue even knows the secrets of Azarath, because somehow, she visited there before. She can even beat Slade by himself, even though he is a master tactician and has beaten the Satellite League before. Mary-Sue is that powerful.

Mary-Sue is often very pretty. She has wonderful hair, that takes multiple paragraphs to describe, and get this: IT CHANGES COLORS! I mean, how amazing is that! (end sarcasm) She has the perfect body that's so skinny, but she's not anorexic. She has amazing, perfect breasts, even though she's only a teenager. Her face is flawless, and she never gets zits. EVER. It's practically impossible for her. She has perfectly straight teeth, too. Her eyes are pools of endless beauty and mystery. Isn't she amazing.

But don't worry, Mary-Sue usually has a tragic past. When she was very little, she watched her parents die. Or she's all that's left of her special, amazing, alien race. Or she's Raven's sister. Whichever one fits. Yet, despite all of this tragedy, she doesn't need therapy. She doesn't have any issues with it actually, except it's sad and it gets either Robin, Beast Boy, or Cyborg to make out with her. Wait…not Cyborg. Cyborg is actually never around her because…he's apparently gained the power to not exist or become invisible and silent.


	4. Xavier Red

**Name**: Xavier Red

**Age**: Varies

Here we meet Xavier Red. Currently, he is being sued by Charles Xavier for stealing his idea and Jason Todd and Bucky for stealing their Anti-Hero shtick. Poor Xavier…it's not his fault that he has a crappy name and gets stuck in crappy fics with crappy plots. So…Xavier Red has a crappy life.

He is apparently the secret identity for Red X. One must wonder why if his name was Xavier Red,he'd take the name Red X. It basically gives away who he is. I mean, it'd be Oliver Queen calling himself Queen O, instead of Green Arrow. This, of course, ignores the fact that Robin created the Red X identity, and the statistics of how a person named Xavier Red would be the next to carry on the mantle. But it's not as if logic actually applies to fanfics written crazed fangirls.

Xavier Red is usually plays the role of the angry, abusive, boyfriend of some girl named Kori, who is supposedly Starfire, or a chick named Rachel. He is their abusive boyfriend because either Richard or Beast Boy were making out with Mary-Sue while Cyborg was on an extended trip to the grocery store. He beats them, or calls them 'whores', and they seemingly still saty with him, despite the fact that they are supposed to be strong, and resourceful super heroines, not women written by Judd Winnick.

Xavier is an over-used plot device. Not annoying as Mary-Sue, but still as deadly, he is a thorn in every Titans fan's side. It's not as if Red X was supposed to be symbolic or anything, and become an allegory for the gray in the world. Instead, he's reduced to the role of a misogynist.

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**To Reviewer Katie:** I hope I don't sound mean either. Kory is Starfire's name. Though people may think it is spelled Kori, it's not, and has never been spelled that way. Obviously, they took time to find out what her Tamaranean name was. It shouldn't be hard to also find out that her name has been spelled Kory since her creation in 1980. They have the internet; they should use it. As for your comments on Dick, it is a known fact that he has been called Dick since his creation. Though is says his name is Richard John Grayson on his birth certificate, he doesn't go by it. Like I said, only Alfred and the government refer to him as Richard Grayson. Wally West does not go by Wallace and Dick Grayson does not go by Richard. It'd be just like constantly calling a person who went by the name Bill his whole life, William for no other reason than the fact that you don't like it. His name is Dick. Not Richard, nor Rick, and certainly not Ricky. Frankly, people who are calling Starfire 'Kori' and Dick 'Richard' are wrong. They should be corrected.


End file.
